Well, it's not really Paradise, because then I'd truly be home and there'd be no tears. I've actually arrived at the next stage in grieving, the actual sadness. Sort of a mess in my head, looking back at everything with sentiment and fondness. Even if I couldn't wait to leave it all behind a month ago. Including my house. job. car.....
I remember I wanted a fresh start and now I'm thinking why? A fresh start is freakin hard work. And I already worked really hard for what I had before.
BUT, I know it's what comes with the time of this season, it's just a little bit on freak out mode!!! AHHHH!
To be honest, some of that fondness comes from the fact that I really did have a nice home and job, and wonderful family and friends near. It's not like I was wanting to leave those things behind. I LOVED those things. I just wanted the promise of what could be.
The reality is: what could be, could still be a while coming...
If we admit it, "what could be" can only be found if we are willing to try something new!
LIKE THIS MANGOSTEEN! Which was awesome, BTW. And I was so glad my husband brought it home to try.
Revealing the sweetest, most lovely fruit inside, that no one would've found, had they not been willing to try something new! It's amazing, if you were wondering. May this journey find me to be better than I appeared from the start...
